Sunday, 16 March 2014

Vancouver Women: Queen Bitch Syndrome Theory

The problem with Vancouver women: Queen bitch syndrome.

I'd like to throw a chip into the ring as to the theory of why Vancouver women suck.

Bitches be crazy, am I right? I mean, I'm willing to admit that even I get crazy sometimes. But there's something about the breed of Vancouver women that is so much worse... 

My boyfriend has a theory. His theory is about why women in Vancouver are known for being so snotty, unapproachable, and rude. And I happen to think his theory is dead-on. You know what I'm talking about, right? I mean, Vancouver is known for being filled with these kind of women. They downright give this town a bad name. 

The thing we've noticed too, is that this is not a problem that stems from a certain scene or niche, it's a pretty widespread epidemic. It doesn't matter if you're hanging out in Yaletown, Main Street, Kits, Gastown or the West End,  these women will be there, making you feel like you don't exist, and/or that they are better than you. 

I mean, Vancouver is a BRUTAL place to be single. I know, I've done it. It's incredibly depressing. It seems that couples here get matched up by their outward appearance. I joke to my boyfriend that he doesn't have to worry about me going out and meeting another guy that I like here, as inevitably every time I meet a random dude out, it just makes me love and appreciate my boyfriend so much more! 

I have a girlfriend who hangs out with some girls in Vancouver who she calls "the toxic 6". Sounds delightful, doesn't it? Yes, these are the women who have double standards, date guys because of how tall they are, how much money they make, the car they drive, and lord, that engagement ring better have a diamond that's such and such size, otherwise you are not getting a yes! (a true Yaletown Vancouver story that I've heard).

I mean hell, how are you supposed to find a life partner in a town where people avoid eye contact when you pass them on the street? They will literally be looking straight ahead until you get closer and then suddenly look to the side, or the ground. What is that about anyways, and where does it come from? But I digress.

Back to the issue at hand: the predominance of unfriendly, superficial, mean women in Vancouver. Here's the theory: Queen Bitch Syndrome. 

It basically goes like this: Vancouver gets fed into by a lot of places across Canada, and especially B.C. The theory is that the Queen Bitch from every small town all over this province, move to Vancouver to be *THE* Queen Bitch. The coolest, prettiest, hottest, smartest gal in town. I mean, she was in her small town, so why can't she be in Vancouver?

The problem of course escalates when they arrive on the scene here and realize that there is some fierce competition: all the other wanna-make-it-in-the-big-city girls that are here too, vying for that same title. And so creates a snake-pit of superficial, unfriendly, caustic females. It's terrifying to say the least, even as a somewhat innocent bystander. 

Well, there you have it: the Queen Bitch Theory.

Monday, 10 February 2014

It's not the 90s anymore

It's not the 90s anymore. This should be a fairly obvious fact, yet sometimes it seems like people are still living their lives like it is. To get a better idea of what I'm talking about, have a look at old economy Steve:

The truth is, things aren't what they used to be, Grandma. 

Recently, my boyfriend and I have taken to revisiting old sitcoms from the 90s. We've found that some of them really stand the test of time, while others.... don't. Cheers was unwatchable, as was Perfect Strangers (not overly surprising though is it?). 

It's funny though, how much less relatable these characters are compared to new shows that are out now. I mean, I am much more like a late 20 something on New Girl, than on Friends or Will and Grace. By the time the "Friends" turned 30, they were pretty much all set. They all had successful jobs that paid the bills, that were pretty much their dream jobs. Sure they had some trials and tribulations along the way (Monica working at the diner, Rachel serving coffee at the coffee shop, Joey an out of work actor), but they all seemed to really pull through in the end (Joey on Days of Our Lives, Rachel working at Ralph Lauren, and Monica head chef at a high end restaurant). Once they decided to get out there and follow their dreams, they were handsomely rewarded for their endeavours. When we watched the episode where Rachel turns 30 and has a meltdown, I just couldn't put myself in her shoes. Rachel, and all the Friends, seemed to have their lives much more together than myself, and a lot of other people my age that I know.

New Girl, on the other hand, now that's a different story. New Girl really portrays what it's like to be a generation Y-er in 2014. Jess lands her dream job as a teacher, gets laid off- has to work at some gross fast food place. Winston plays pro basketball, gets cut from the team. Has no real life or job experience, and has to be a nanny. Nick drops out of law-school, becomes a bartender. I mean, I think I know people, or I myself, have lived pretty much these exact scenarios.

Anyways, my point in all this is just that, it's not the 90s anymore. Clearly.

Saturday, 11 January 2014

3 dressed up as a 9

If I may, I’m going to have to broach an age old subject. Yes, the longstanding tradition of men rating womens’ hotness in terms of a number ranging from 1 to 10. God, it really chaps my ass. And I know it’s a futile thing to get upset about, but it just seems that this number system has no room for the personality factor.

A couple of months ago, I went to visit a good girlfriend out of town. She was telling me about how her roommate, let’s call him Adam, was lonely and how she was planning to set him up with this awesome girl that she worked with. She said that she was talking to Adam’s cousin and his cousin, who knew this girl, said, “Yeah, but she’s not a 10, and Adam wants a 10”. Cue my eyes rolling.

It's just annoying is all. I feel like some men just need to have a “10” on their arm so that other guys are like, oh he’s got a 10! I know I have a male friend who needs to be with a woman that all his friends think is hot.Shouldn't all that matter is that he finds her attractive? My boyfriend reassures me though, that this is very common and normal. But it doesn't mean that I have to be any less annoyed by it.

One night one of my guy friends exclaimed to me "You look like a 9 tonight!" It was one of those compliments masquerading as an insult. Or is it an insult masquerading as compliment? Either way, it was something. Maybe I was just a 3 dressed up as a 9 that night: